Getting Started
Think of someone you know who is genuinely recognised in your community for being a loving person. What is it about them that people notice? What do they actually do?
Read the Word
In the message this week, Ps Andy took us to John 13. Read the passage carefully before discussing it.
John 13:1–17
It was just before the Passover Festival. Jesus knew that the hour had come for him to leave this world and go to the Father. Having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end. The evening meal was in progress, and the devil had already prompted Judas, the son of Simon Iscariot, to betray Jesus. Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God; so he got up from the meal, took off his outer clothing, and wrapped a towel around his waist. After that, he poured water into a basin and began to wash his disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel that was wrapped around him. He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, “Lord, are you going to wash my feet?” Jesus replied, “You do not realise now what I am doing, but later you will understand.” “No,” said Peter, “you shall never wash my feet.” Jesus answered, “Unless I wash you, you have no part with me.” Then Simon Peter replied, “Not just my feet but my hands and my head as well!” Jesus answered, “Those who have had a bath need only to wash their feet; their whole body is clean. And you are clean, though not every one of you.” For he knew who was going to betray him, and that was why he said not every one was clean. When he had finished washing their feet, he put on his clothes and returned to his place. “Do you understand what I have done for you?” he asked them. “You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and rightly so, for that is what I am. Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. Very truly I tell you, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them.”
John 13:34–35
“A new command I give you: love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”
1 Timothy 1:3–5
When I left for Macedonia, I urged you to stay there in Ephesus and stop those whose teaching is contrary to the truth. Don’t let them waste their time in endless discussion of myths and spiritual pedigrees. These things only lead to meaningless speculations, which don’t help people live a life of faith in God. The purpose of my instruction is that all believers would be filled with love that comes from a pure heart, a clear conscience, and genuine faith.
These passages sit at the very heart of what Christian discipleship looks like in practice. The 1 Timothy text frames the goal of all Christian teaching, and the John 13 passage shows us what that goal looks like when it is embodied — by Jesus himself, the night before he died.
Going Deeper
John 13 opens the section of John’s Gospel often called the Farewell Discourse (chapters 13–17). Everything that follows — the upper room teaching, Jesus’s prayer for his disciples — flows from this moment. John sets the scene deliberately: it is just before Passover, the feast that commemorated Israel’s rescue from slavery. Jesus is fully aware of what is coming. He knows the Father has placed all things under his authority. He knows Judas is about to betray him. He knows Peter will deny him before morning. And it is precisely in that moment, with that full knowledge, that he takes a towel and a basin and gets down on the floor.
Foot washing in the first-century Roman world was real, necessary work. Roads were dusty and sandalled feet were genuinely filthy. It was the task assigned to the lowest-ranking household servant, and in Jewish custom even a disciple was not expected to wash his teacher’s feet. So when Jesus — the one his own disciples correctly address as Lord and Teacher — takes that position, the shock for everyone in the room would have been profound. Peter’s refusal makes complete sense within that cultural setting. It felt wrong. Disordered. Undignified.
Jesus’s reply to Peter is striking: “Unless I wash you, you have no part with me.” The foot washing is simultaneously a literal act of service and a picture of something deeper. To receive Jesus’s cleansing — his forgiveness, his work on our behalf — is not optional for those who want to belong to him. Peter cannot put himself right before God. None of us can. The washing must be received before it can be passed on.
Then Jesus turns the act into instruction. “Do you understand what I have done for you?” He doesn’t leave them to draw their own conclusions. He explicitly names it as an example — the Greek word hupodeigma means a pattern set out to be copied. The one with all authority chose the lowest position. Philippians 2 describes the same movement: Christ, who existed in the nature of God, made himself nothing and took the form of a servant. This is not a temporary posture Jesus adopts reluctantly. It flows from who he is.
The command in verse 34 is introduced as new. The command to love was not itself new — Leviticus 19:18 already called Israel to love their neighbour. What is new is the standard: as I have loved you. The measure of Christian love is no longer simply human reciprocity or cultural expectation. It is calibrated to the cross. And Jesus says the watching world will use this as its test: by this everyone will know that you are my disciples.
Paul’s word to Timothy in 1 Timothy 1 reinforces this from a different angle. All teaching, all doctrine, all biblical instruction has a destination: believers filled with love that flows from a pure heart, a clear conscience, and genuine faith. Knowledge that does not produce love has missed the point.
Discussion
- What details does John include at the beginning of this passage about what Jesus knew before he got up and took the towel? Why do you think John includes those details?
- Andy pointed out that Paul tells Timothy the goal of all Christian instruction is that believers would be filled with love. How does that sit with the way you typically think about the purpose of Bible study or church teaching?
- Jesus tells Peter: “Unless I wash you, you have no part with me.” Why is receiving from Jesus — accepting his cleansing rather than insisting on managing things yourself — so difficult for some of us?
- Andy asked: are there things we consider beneath us? Tasks or people that feel below our pay grade? What does this passage have to say to that?
- The command to love is measured against how Jesus loved — including people who were about to betray and abandon him. Where does that standard actually press on you personally in your current relationships?
- Andy said: “The love that Jesus wants us to show will often happen in secret where nobody knows.” What is the difference between serving in order to be appreciated and serving because you love someone? How can you tell which one is driving you?
- If the people who know you best — family, workmates, neighbours — were asked what you are known for, what do you think they would say? What would you want them to say?
Living It Out
- Choose one person this week who is genuinely difficult for you to love — someone you disagree with, someone who has hurt you, or someone you tend to overlook — and do one concrete, unannounced act of service or kindness for them.
- Notice what stops you. When you find yourself pulling back from serving or loving someone this week, pause and ask honestly: is it pride, a desire for recognition, or an expectation that they should meet you halfway first? Bring what you find to God in prayer.
- Let the 1 Timothy 1 test shape how you engage with church life. Whether it is a life group discussion, a sermon, or time reading Scripture, ask at the end: has this made me more loving? If your engagement with Christian teaching is producing more argument and less love, something needs to change.
Prayer
Close by giving group members a moment of quiet to think of one relationship or situation where they know love is genuinely hard. Then pray together — thanking Jesus for the love he demonstrated at the cross, asking for the humility to receive his cleansing, and asking for the courage to love the way he loves, even when it costs something.
Leader Notes
Timing: Getting Started should stay brief — two minutes at most. Going Deeper is meant to be read or summarised by the leader, not discussed yet; resist the temptation to let conversation start there. Save your time for Discussion questions 4, 5, and 6, which are where the real work happens.
Likely sticking point — question 2: Some group members may feel defensive here, as if valuing theological depth is being criticised. Clarify that Andy was not dismissing careful Bible study — he was asking about its fruit. The issue Paul raises in 1 Timothy is not study itself but study that produces speculation and division rather than love.
Pastoral care — question 5: The standard of loving those who are about to betray or abandon you can land heavily on people who have experienced genuine hurt or abuse. Be careful not to imply that love requires staying in unsafe situations or pretending harm did not happen. If this surfaces, it may be worth naming that love and wisdom belong together, and that some situations need careful pastoral support beyond the group.
Question 7 is the most searching personal reflection in the set. Give people genuine space with it. Silence is fine. You do not need to fill it. Andy’s honest admission — “I’m pretty good, but I can always do better” — gives you permission to hold the question lightly without letting the group off the hook entirely.
On the servant posture theme: Andy connected this to very ordinary church life — morning tea, cleaning rosters, kids ministry. It is worth affirming that those unglamorous acts of service are exactly what this passage is pointing to. Encourage the group to name specific, local examples rather than staying abstract.